Falcon/Archive 1

Check Results - 24 April 2010

Personality: Overall - While it technically meets the minimum length please increase the overall quality. Non-clan cats are held to a higher level of quality than clanners because they are a privilege and non-esentiall to the running of this game. Currently it's something I would let through on a clan cat only on a technicality.

Appearance

• Overall - Said about appearance, overall quality and level of detail needs to be improved. In a clanner this would get through on technicality when it lacks detail entirely.
• Length - Minimum length of a 4 sentence paragraph has not been reached.
• a mostly white tom with patches of ginger fur - Where are the patches?

HISTORY

• Slyvia never lived long enough to name her kits. Shortly after their birth she passed due to complications. - This is just a note, but as the kittens never received colostrum (the milk produced immediately after birth) they would be subject to a week immune system.
• He didn't remain there for long, for as soon as he was able he left, wanting to live a life outside the housefolk nest. - Please describe how a cat who, at 2 months or so old, survived in the wild for a year without anyone having ever bothered to teach him how.
• Falcon spends his days as a wanderer, sleeping where he can and eating what he can. He occasionally enters Whitehart in hopes of coming across new housecats. - This definition is suggestive of a Feral, not a semi-feral. See PSA #19. If entering Whitehart is a special occasion for him, it sounds like he's fully attending to his own affairs with no assistance from humanity.

 Kitsufox  ^{Fox's Den} 09:20, 24 April 2010 (CDT)

Check Results - 4 May 2010

I apologize for the long lag in this. It's been a very busy time for me.

Appearance: Overall - While it technically meets the minimum length please increase the overall quality. Non-clan cats are held to a higher level of quality than clanners because they are a privilege and non-esentiall to the running of this game. Currently it's something I would let through on a clan cat only on a technicality.

Family Members: Full-Blooded Siblings; 2 unnamed she-cats - Please specify that they are deceased.

 Kitsufox  ^{Fox's Den} 17:39, 4 May 2010 (CDT)

17 May 2010

I approved this, but keep in mind that the appearance is still pretty weak and could get a lot stronger from here.  Kitsufox  ^{Fox's Den} 12:46, 17 May 2010 (CDT)